This weekend a 75 year old cancer patient came into my ER. She had let her grandson cut her hair into a mohawk before it all fell out. IMMD.

While on my computer i heard my fiance who was laying down by me start talking in his sleep.I turned to him and asked What is it honey? He looked at me and replied “You can’t give insurance to a fish.. they are a fish!” and he sounded so concerned IMMD!

My mom was outside working in the yard when a hot air balloon flew right into our neighborhood about 30 feet above our houses. when i came outside the people in the balloon looked over the basket and shouted to us, “WE REALLY LOVE YOUR LANDSCAPING.” Totally MMD!!!

Submitted by: Tori

I was driving today and saw a street called Hitchcock Lane. Above the sign was another that said Dead End. Totally MMD

Submitted by: Rayvyn

A bunch of my family went to go see Toy Story 3. We all got there a little late and had to sit kind of separated from each other. My dad ended up sitting next to a little girl. She looked up at him and in complete seriousness, asked “Are you going to strangle me?” IMMD

Submitted by: TBraginski

I was sitting at my desk at work when a cute girl I work with (while taking a quick nap) groaned, “Uh… Degobah system…” I think I’m in love! IMMD

Submitted by:

NRRJSchmitz

My aunt asked if she could bring her grandsons (6 and 2 years old) over to meet my best friend’s new puppy. The 2-year-old, who calls the family cat a “meow-meow,” saw the cat-sized puppy and went very quiet. Finally, in a puzzled tone, he pointed at the dog and inquired, “Meow-meow?” IMMD!

Submitted by: Iyam

I once got a text in a fortune cookie saying “Life would be so much easier if we could just look at the source code.” IMMD (it still does)

Submitted by:

Bernie84

When we got into math class our teacher gave us graphing calculators, and told us we were going to try something new. He told us what equations to input, and what to put as the window settings. We entered the information, expecting the calculator to graph a line or two as usual. There was a gasp of surprise and then laughter as the calculators instead drew a perfect heart, and then shaded it in. It was a late valentine’s day greeting form our math teacher!

The other day I was checking the system logs on my NIX server when I encountered a new shutdown message: Preparing for suicide.
IMMD!

Submitted by:

troutmon